Princess Daisy and Princess Shokora (from Super Mario Land and Wario Land 3)
Actually, screw you, this isn’t an ill advised ship at all. This is a great one. The only ill advised part about it is their union would merge two powerful kingdoms together who could then overpower the Mushroom Kingdom.
Reasons they work: Both are feisty princesses from kingdoms with a diverse range of territories. Additionally, they have both dealt with unusual non-troopa related threats in their lands. Plus, both have mighty pyramids in their lands, and Daisy seems like she’d be really cool with Shokora’s shape shifting shadow abilities.
Reasons it works: I mean, isn’t it obvious? They’re both secondary villains who appear in a lot of the same sport and party games, and they both have played supportive roles in Smash while ultimately being unable to be fighters themselves. Additionally they’re pretty good dancers, and Waluigi has been known to have a pretty good green thumb over the years.
Dupree and Flavio from Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door.
Reason they work: Uuuuuhhhh they both have purple hair, large noses and fantastic fashion sense? Ok but really they are both well traveled individuals who can be a “bit much” when it comes to their antics, but they are ultimately harmless nerds who just want to be loved.
Unlike Link & Ganon or Mario & Bowser, Ridley and Samus have one very clear storyline.
And they hate each other.
A playful and friendly child, Samus Aran lived with her parents on a colony until it was attacked by Space Pirates led by Ridley. The Chozo, a race of bird-like aliens, arrived too late to stop the colony’s massacre, and took in Samus, the only survivor.
Takeaway: Ridley killed Samus’ parents and destroyed her home.
Samus’ upbringing was placed in the hands (talons?) of two of the Chozo, Old Bird and Gray Voice. To make sure that Samus could survive on the Chozo homeworld of Zebes, Gray Voice spliced some of his genes into Samus’ DNA, making her part-Chozo.
When Samus was only a teenager, the Chozo were betrayed by their supercomputer, Mother Brain. Mother Brain summoned Ridley’s Space Pirates to Zebes, lowering the planet’s defenses in return for the Space Pirates’ allegiance.
Samus was only able to escape the Space Pirate siege because Gray Voice sacrificed himself to get her off Zebes.
Takeaway: Ridley killed Samus’ adopted parent, and destroyed her home AGAIN.
Years later, Samus returned to Zebes as a seasoned warrior. Ridley and Mother Brain were trying to harness the power of Metroids - strange creatures created by the Chozo to be an ultimate weapon against the deadliest creatures in the galaxy. Samus triumphed.
Takeaway: Samus blew up the Space Pirate base, blew up the Ridley’s flagship, blew up Mother Brain, blew up Ridley, and blew up a robot copy Ridley had made of himself.
What was left of Ridley was recovered by surviving space pirates, who turned him into a cybernetic monstrosity. Although Ridley never speaks in games, logs written by Space Pirates indicated that he was brilliant, cunning, and cruel, with a sadistic sense of humor. He fought Samus several times while trying to obtain a powerful substance called Phazon, and eventually fought her with a Phazon-enhanced body. Samus triumphed.
Takeaway: Samus blew up Ridley again and again, regardless of what he did to enhance his body.
When trying to eliminate the threat of Metroids once and for all by wiping out a planet infested with them, Samus came across a newly-hatched “baby” Metroid that imprinted upon her as if she was its mother. Feeling compassion, she spared it… and then Ridley tried to kidnap it, but was stopped by Samus.
And then, as soon as she let down her guard, Ridley returned and kidnapped the baby Metroid. He took it back to Zebes, where Mother Brain had been repaired. Samus was able to defeat them again, but the baby Metroid was killed in the battle, sacrificing itself to save Samus. Samus destroyed Zebes.
Takeaway: Ridley kidnapped a baby Metroid that saw Samus as its mother, leading to its death. Samus blew up Ridley again, and then blew up the entire planet he was on.
(Summary: Ridley killed Samus family, then destroyed her adopted family, laid waste to every home she’s ever known, and kidnapped an alien child that viewed Samus as it’s mother, causing it’s death. Samus has blown him up countless times, even blowing up an entire planet with him on it.)
There is a design parallel between the Mario Bros. and the princesses traditionally paired up with them. The number of eyelashes on Princess Peach’s eyes - six - matches the number of curved segments in Mario’s mustache. Likewise, Princess Daisy has two eyelashes on each eye, which matches Luigi’s two-segment mustache. Whether this is a coincidence or a deliberate design choice is unknown.
i hate this blog for bringing this to my attention. i’m not going to be able to think about literally anything else ever again. i’m going to tell all of my friends about this every time mario is brought up at all. fuck you
Anonymous sent: That lonely guy sitting on a bench in New Donk City and O'Chunks
